Divorce Mediation and Counseling – How to reduce the negative effects of divorce on mom, dad, and the kids.
Traditionally, the two happiest days in our lives are the day we get married and the day we welcome the birth of our child. Arguably, the third happiest day for many of those married people is the day their divorce is finalized. That happiness doesn’t necessarily stem from a renewed sense of freedom; rather, the relief is because the battle is over. The fight is done. Win or lose – everyone can begin to move forward into their new lives.
Divorce has always earned a bad reputation. For decades, popular culture has defined divorce as a battle, or going to war with your spouse. Sadly, that truly describes the majority of divorces where each spouse becomes a willing combatant and the pressure to win is reinforced by friends, family, and oftentimes, your attorney. This creates an environment where the participants are focused solely on the battle – oblivious to the toll the fight takes on their psyche and emotional well-being. If kids are involved, the consequences of going to war with your spouse are indelible and certainly the kids suffer regardless of who “wins.”
Divorce Mediation and Counseling offers a refreshing alternative to typical protracted, combative, expensive litigated divorces. Divorce Mediation and Counseling provides the opportunity for divorcing couples to make informed decisions about parenting and the division of property. Our process also makes it easier to co-parent after the divorce.
The divorce process at Divorce Mediation and Counseling inserts a neutral, objective mediator between wife and husband, and doesn’t act as a lawyer to either party; rather, during an open session, the mediator guides both parties to consider issues common to most divorces. These topics may include:
- Child custody and visitation
- Child support
- Personal affects
- Health insurance
This free and open exchange of information provides each spouse opportunities to negotiate with one another with confidence. Because everyone begins with the same information, our process often takes less time to frame agreements acceptable to each person. Mediation is voluntary and we ask each party to commit to it in good faith, to be open to exchanging information, and to compromise when it is in everyone’s best interest.
Mediation and Its Benefits
- Efficiency Equals Speed
Mediation is designed to be quick and efficient compared to typical divorce, which can be unpredictable and slow. Divorce processed traditionally through court usually takes months or years.
- Prevents Escalation of Conflict and Defuses Hostility
Mediation’s peaceful, private atmosphere makes everyone feel more comfortable and safe. Mediation mitigates despair, hurt, fear and anger. Together you develop a plan for your children’s future.
- Confidential and Private
Mediation helps avoid exposure of financial and personal information to the public. All information revealed during mediation is kept confidential even when the divorce is finalized in court.
- Improves Communication and Cooperation
Mediation promotes communication and cooperation between the two parties.
The process of mediation empowers each party to tailor an agreement more sensitive, creative and effective to their individual needs.
- Reduced Cost
Mediation can dramatically reduce the cost of divorce. Typically, mediation is a small fraction of litigating a divorce.
Unlike litigation, where the objective is for only one party to win, mediated settlements are mutually acceptable solutions where both parties win.
Counseling for a Better Divorce
DMC incorporates divorce counseling into mediation because counseling shifts emphasis from past problems to focus on solutions. Counseling helps all parties leave the past behind to and focus on the future.
Co-parenting after Your Divorce
You won’t be a spouse after your divorce, but each of you will still be a parent. It’s helpful to consider these questions:
- How will you be involved in the life of your child or children?
- How can you model respectful, adult behavior if you and your former spouse cannot get along?
- Can you get along with your former spouse well enough to give your children the benefits each of you brings to parenting?
Co-parenting means both parents play an active role in the daily lives of their children. Each parent is equally responsible for the care and education of the children. Your children grow and thrive when their parents are a team working on their behalf.
“Parenthood creates ‘enduring connections, ties that outlast the severance of the adult relationship.’” Professor Patrick Parkinson
Co-parenting and Its Benefits
- Children develop a sense of stability when both parents are engaged in their lives.
- Children continue their relationships with both of their parents.
- There is a lesser chance that children will feel torn between parents.
- The children are less likely to feel abandoned.
Is there a way for something as negative and sad as divorce to be made easier and less stressful for a couple and their children?
Divorce Mediation and Counseling.